


What Happens in Vegas...

by dogmaticdeux



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Angst, Band Fic, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Or Is It?, Unrequited Love, band au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2019-05-05 11:16:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14617275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dogmaticdeux/pseuds/dogmaticdeux
Summary: Aoi and Ruki to go Vegas to party and enjoy America. They wake up in the morning hung over like hell only to realize that they’re married and Elvis was the one who wed them. - this was part of the Valentine's Day prompts on Tumblr





	What Happens in Vegas...

**Author's Note:**

> Soo, almost three months later and I've finally gotten around to uploading this on here as well. It's a repost from my Tumblr, so some of you might already know this story. It was part of the Valentine's Day prompts by Aoi-sensei on Tumblr in February this year. Please enjoy!

After a predominantly overcast sky all morning, single rays of sunshine finally managed to push past the dark, heavy clouds, falling through the big windows of the spacious hotel room, and warmly caressed Ruki’s sleeping face. His nose twitched and he squinted his closed eyes with a discontent grunt as the glaring midday sun disrupted his deep, comatose-like sleep. He turned his head the other way, groaning a second time as a sharp pain shot through his head like lightning, which yanked him completely out of his drowsy state. He massaged his forehead with his fingertips in an attempt to calm his throbbing skull, but to no avail, and grunting like an old man again, he slowly opened his eyes. He blinked a few times to focus his blurry gaze and accustom his sensitive eyes to the brightness in the bedroom, but when his sight finally returned back to normal, his heart stopped in horror.

Why the hell was Aoi lying right next to him in _his_ bed in _his_ hotel room?

Ruki blinked repeatedly, in the hopes that Aoi’s sleeping figure was nothing more than a dream, a mere hallucination caused by his headache at best. But no matter how often he closed his eyes, he would always reopen them to the sight of the dark-haired guitarist passed out on the mattress only inches away from him. Gulping down his panic, he tried to calm his now rapidly hammering heart, telling himself that there had to be a logical explanation for this. Of course there was a logical explanation for this, because why on earth would Aoi choose to sleep in his bed, when he had his own room booked just down the hallway? They probably just got too wasted the previous night, and Aoi had been too drunk to make it to his own room, and Ruki had been too dumb to tell him to fuck off and leave him alone in the name of self-preservation. Because let’s be real, what else could Aoi ever want from him but his comfortable hotel bed?

Nothing, exactly.

That thought stung more than he would ever admit, causing Ruki to inhale deeply to ease the pain in his chest that threatened to trump his mind-numbing headache. Cautiously, he glanced at Aoi’s sleeping frame, holding his breath as Aoi shifted beneath the covers, afraid that he had woken up. Aoi, however, only hummed quietly in his sleep before shifting again, and pushed his blanket down a few inches, revealing his – completely naked – chest in the process. Ruki gasped in shock, not able to stop himself from staring at his alluring chest, tracing every inch of naked skin greedily with his eyes; something he never ought to do when Aoi was awake. But now that he was fast asleep and with no one else around, there was no stopping Ruki in hungrily devouring the sight of what he so desperately desired but would never have. He was never one to back down from pursuing what he wanted, and normally ‘impossible’ was a word that didn’t exist in his vocabulary.

Not when it concerned Aoi, though. For as long as he remembered, he had wanted the guitarist, had seen him in ways that far transcended friendship, had longed for him secretly even though he knew he shouldn’t feel this way. Not that there was anything wrong with liking men, but desiring one of his closest friends, someone he considered family, was simply _unthinkable._ Which was one of the reasons why he had never confessed his feelings to Aoi. The other being that the chances of Aoi returning his feelings was close to zero, and he truly didn’t want to deal with the rejection and all the awkwardness that would come with it. So instead, he kept his inappropriate feelings to himself, only relishing in them when he was alone, or when he felt especially masochistic like he did right now. Blocking out his headache to the best of his abilities, Ruki continued to stare at Aoi’s chest, a warm fluttering coursing through his body as he traced the outlines of his torso with his eyes, wandering across his collarbones to his neck, where he spotted a dark mark.

Ruki froze.

Was that what he thought it was? Hesitantly, he leaned forward to check the dark spot on Aoi’s neck, positively identifying it as a hickey. His chest contracted painfully as he tried to remember last night, which was nothing more than a huge blur in his memories. Had Aoi found some pretty girl to spend the evening with? Had he at one point made out with a woman? Ruki really couldn’t remember, everything beyond a certain point of time last night was simply gone; he realized that he had drunk far too much alcohol – something he rarely ever did, since he knew exactly how low his alcohol tolerance lay. Why had he let himself go like that? Was it because he had seen Aoi make out with someone else and couldn’t handle the heartache? But why would Aoi be in bed beside him if he had found someone to amuse himself with? Surely they wouldn’t have left it at that for the night? Unless Aoi being here meant something entirely different than him just bluntly stripping out of his clothes for the night…?

The panic clawed its way back up Ruki’s throat and he shook his head as he considered this ridiculous idea. It was simply not possible. To prove this point to his stupid brain, Ruki sat upright to pull the covers from his body, gasping in horror as he was confronted with his own naked body. His head started spinning, and this time it wasn’t caused by the headache or the residual alcohol still flowing through his blood. Numbly, he looked around the room, a wave of sickness filling him up as he took in their clothes that lay scattered all across the floor. “Oh God, no,” he whispered desperately, looking down at his body again, and this time he noticed the incriminating love bites as well as sticky evidence of their drunken deeds all over his pale skin.

_No no no no no no no. God, no. Please tell me this is just a fucking misunderstanding! Oh God, no._

His breathing fastened as the panic spread throughout his entire body, and he buried his trembling fingers in his short blonde strands. What the hell had he done? Had he really slept with Aoi, the one person he had been harboring feelings for for years, the one person he had tried his best to keep from finding out the truth so desperately? Had he really gotten so shitfaced the previous night that he had thrown all caution to the wind and simply given in, for reasons that were beyond his own comprehension? How could he have been this fucking stupid? Ruki jumped out of the bed, and quickly grabbed his black morning robe, only feeling slightly better after he had wrapped his exposed body in the soft fabric. He had known from the beginning that it had been a bad idea to give in to Aoi’s pleas to accompany him on his short trip to Vegas after they had met up with the American branch of their record label to finalize the production of their newest album. But Aoi had been too damn persistent, and he had found himself incapable of saying no to that damn adorable pout that melted his heart every damn time. Now he was getting his comeuppance for being too careless. How was he supposed to just move on from this, even when he couldn’t remember a single thing? Just the knowledge that he had had sex with Aoi alone was enough to throw him completely off-balance. And surely their night wouldn’t mean more to Aoi than a casual one-night-stand, when to Ruki it basically meant the world. How in the Devil’s name could he have fucked up this badly?

“Ruki?” he heard a husky voice murmur that usually sent pleasant shivers down his spine. Now, however, it rattled him to the bone, meanwhile an iron-clad fist closed around his heart and squeezed it mercilessly until it was about to burst. “Ugh, fuck. My head feels like it’s gonna explode.”

Ruki tried to utter a bitter laugh, but no sound left his mouth. Normally, he was outstanding in putting up a façade and pretending like everything was peachy, but now his body and mind both seemed to fail him completely. Reluctantly, he turned around to face Aoi, afraid to look him in the eye; yet, he had no other choice if he didn’t want to end up staring at his naked chest again. He cleared his throat to regain his ability to speak, but his voice still refused to take up service. Aoi, who apparently thought it weird as well that he of all people seemed to be incapable of speaking, whereas he normally blabbed away like there was no tomorrow, frowned deeply. However, he elected not to comment on Ruki’s lack of speech, sat upright and stretched his arms out in front of his body with a content yawn. He either hadn’t caught up with their precarious situation yet, or he simply didn’t care – Ruki couldn’t tell which one it was and he was too much of a coward to address the giant elephant in the room on his own.

“Huh?” Aoi muttered, curiously eyeing his right hand as though he had never seen it before, “that’s weird.” He lifted his hand up above his head and stared at it in awe, the big question mark practically visible on his face. “I don’t think I recognize this ring,” he pondered, tilting his head to look at it from yet another angle. “Did I get that last night?”

“Who knows,” Ruki huffed dismissively, far more concerned with different issues. He felt like he was on tenterhooks, so he trotted to his pants, which were the nearest item of his clothing that he could spot. He reached down to pick them up, for he hoped that finding something to occupy himself with would help put his mind and heart at ease, but he froze again as he noted an unfamiliar silver ring on the ring finger of his right hand. “What the-?” he breathed in confusion, bringing his hand to his face just like Aoi had mere seconds ago, and examined it thoroughly. He gasped in horror when realization dawned on him as to w _hat kind of ring_ he was wearing. “Oh shit no!” he cursed, feeling every ounce of blood drain from his face. He scurried over to the king-sized bed and dropped down on the mattress right next to Aoi, his trepidation overtaking any and every other emotion. Without a second thought, he grabbed Aoi’s hand and pulled it towards him, making him grunt in protest at the rough treatment. As he studied the ring Aoi was wearing meticulously, Ruki felt tears of despair well up inside of him. This couldn’t be happening.

The rings were a perfect match.

Aoi finally seemed to catch up, and his face paled as well, “Are those…?” his voice broke off and he stared at Ruki panicky, before he eventually became aware of their overall situation. He glanced around in a haze, picking up on his naked upper body and the scattered clothes as well as Ruki being clothed in nothing more than a morning robe. “Oi, what… what happened here?” he asked quietly, his hesitant voice a far cry from his usually cheerful tone that normally burst with self-confidence.

Rubbing his temples, Ruki looked around the room again, trying his hardest to avoid Aoi’s look. What was he supposed to say? There was no need to spell things out when everything pointed so unmistakably in one direction; a direction which he still refused to accept. When he took notice of a sheet of paper that stuck out of his leather jacket, he stood up and walked over to it, silently unfolding the paper. He breathed in sharply, his insides twisted at the content of the paper. Dazed, he trotted back to the bed, where he dropped onto the mattress only seconds before his legs threatened to give out beneath him.

“What’s that?” Aoi asked in a concerned tone, and Ruki felt his eyes on him all the while he couldn’t take his eyes off the paper in his hands. The one thing that confirmed the truth, the one thing that made his most terrifying nightmare yet an agonizing reality.

His voice was a mere whisper when he answered him, “A marriage certificate,” he swallowed dryly, hysteria crawling all over his body, “ _Our_ marriage certificate.” With shaky fingers he handed Aoi the official paper stating both their real names as the newly wed parties.

Aoi studied the paper thoroughly, his face paling more and more, “Do you mean to say we got totally plastered and then we decided to get married?” he uttered incredulously. He stared at the sheet of paper again as though it would thumb its nose any minute now and mock him for stupidly believing its cruel joke. “Elvis?” he read, “The fuck?” He lifted the sheet and showed it to Ruki, who in the meantime had begun to gnaw at his lower lip nervously, “It says here that Elvis wed us. Uhm, but that’s not possible?” he murmured in confusion.

Ruki sighed abashedly, his thoughts scattered in every direction, “It was probably an impostor or something. I don’t know, I don’t remember much. Probably another one of these clowns that claimed they’re Elvis reincarnated. We saw two of them yesterday, remember? One of them tried to chat us up on the street, and we ran into another one at that huge Casino.” He shook his head in disbelief, instantly regretting it the moment unmitigated pain shot through his skull. Well, growing up in Japan he was of course used to cosplayers of any sort, and even some of their fans liked to put a lot of time and effort into cosplaying individual members of their band, but still – these Elvis copy-cats were something else entirely.

“Right,” Aoi mumbled sheepishly, obviously feeling utterly stupid for not having drawn that conclusion himself. Exhaling tiredly, he dropped the paper onto his lap, and looked Ruki over instead, making him blush under his intense glance. Aoi’s eyes halted on his neck, and he squinted, “Is that… a hickey?” Ruki’s eyes widened in shock and hastily, he covered the spot Aoi was staring at so intently with his hand. His heart started to race like crazy, and it became hard for him to breathe; how in the seven hells was he supposed to come out of this whole mess unscathed? He wasn’t – that much he was certain of as Aoi pulled back his blanket without so much as a warning, exposing the rest of his nude body. Ruki gasped at the sight, and quickly turned his gaze away all the while blushing even deeper like a dumb little schoolgirl. On stage, he was shameless, always teasing the other guys and giving himself as lewdly as possible, but when it came to Aoi – and when the rush of adrenaline wasn’t coursing through his veins – he barely recalled how to function properly. How none of the members had noticed anything thus far remained a mystery to him. “Did we… have sex?” Aoi asked bluntly, causing Ruki to choke on his own saliva right as he took a deep breath to calm his agitated body.

He started coughing until tears pricked at the corners of his eyes, and it took Aoi rubbing his back in a soothing manner to calm down his coughs. “Fuck,” he whispered, furiously blinking the tears away that were now a display of his frustration. “How did it come to this?” he said more to himself than to Aoi, tugging at his hair in despair, “How are we supposed to fix this fucking mess? How could I have been so stupid?” This would ruin everything; his friendship with Aoi, perhaps even the band, but most certainly his heart. His heart, which he had tried so hard to protect for so long.

“What do you mean?” Aoi retorted, sounding oddly hurt. Luckily, he possessed the decency to cover his lower body with his blanket again after his rather shameless exhibit.

Ruki looked at him, a mask of incomprehension on his face, “What do you think I mean?” He grabbed the piece of paper, only to toss it back at Aoi, “I mean t _his._ We need to fix this, all of it. Shit!” he ran his fingers through his hair, unable to come up with a sufficient solution to their twisted situation due to the throbbing headache. Why, oh why had he agreed to take Aoi along on his trip to explore Vegas? He should have known that something bad was going to happen, he should have anticipated it. “This is a fucking disaster!”

Aoi uttered a bitter laugh, “Wow,” he snorted, “I really don’t understand. No matter how much I try to, I just don’t get it. Why do you hate me so much? What did I do to make you despise me like this?”

“Huh?” Ruki looked at him appalled, not fully grasping what he had just heard, not comprehending the absurdity of Aoi’s words. Him, hating Aoi? How could he? “What are you talking about?” he muttered clueless.

“You know damn well what I’m talking about!” Aoi flared up, causing Ruki to flinch at his sudden anger. His eyes, however, did not reflect the same anger audible in Aoi’s voice, but instead displayed a mix of exhaustion and sadness. Ruki frowned as he realized that this wasn’t the first time he heard Aoi utter these silly words, and though being completely battered from the alcohol consumption, his brain still managed to conjure up the blurry memories from last night, from before he had blacked out completely.

  
  


“Why do you hate me so much?”

“Come again?” Ruki looked up from his cocktail, frowning as he took in Aoi’s upset state; he glared at him with a painful grimace, his dark eyes glazed over by the alcohol. Granted, Ruki hadn’t drunk much less, for constantly being around Aoi, and Aoi alone, was wearing him down extremely. Was wearing his heart down, to be precise. The alcohol had helped calm his nerves, though now he didn’t trust his senses anymore, nor the words he thought he had heard Aoi just utter.

Aoi clicked his tongue in annoyance, his fingers started to drum a steady beat on the counter. They had managed to find a somewhat quieter bar on the outskirts of Vegas, where the bass wasn’t as deafening, so one could still hold a conversation with ease. “Why do you hate me so much?” Aoi asked again, his words sounded slightly slurred due to the alcohol consumption.

Embarrassedly, Ruki whirled the ice cubes around in his glass with his straw. What made Aoi spout nonsense like that? Why would he ask him if he hated him, when in fact…? Ruki shook his head, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he muttered, “I don’t hate you.”

“Yeah, sure,” Aoi hissed, which had Ruki frown at his derogatory tone. He lifted his gaze to look at him with reluctance, and was met with Aoi’s accusatory eyes. “Then why do you always treat me as though I’m not there when we’re performing?” Aoi shook his head before he grabbed his glass and downed the rest of his whiskey in one go, “You always fool around with Reita, and even Kai if the occasion arises, and don’t get me started on Uruha. You always stick to him like glue, but me… you avoid me like the plague. _And I just don’t get it._ ” He gestured wildly with his arms to put emphasis on his words and vent his anger that obviously had piled up over a long period of time from the way Aoi was acting. “You barely even look at me when we pass each other on stage. Did I do something wrong? Did I piss you off somehow? Please tell me because I can’t take it any longer!”

Ruki bit down on the inside of his cheek. “That’s not it,” he retorted silently. If only he could tell Aoi the real reason. If only he could tell him that he simply was afraid. Afraid to even look at him while he was pumped with adrenaline, afraid of what he might do if he let himself go around Aoi like he did around the others. Afraid that people would be able to tell. His words, however, only earned him an incredulous laugh from Aoi. Where was this stemming from? Was it the alcohol talking? Or had he really hurt Aoi that deeply without even realizing it by pushing him away like that? “Please, Aoi, you gotta believe me. I don’t hate you, I-“ he broke off, and dropped his gaze back onto his cocktail glass. It felt humiliating; not only being called out like this for his foolish actions, but for attempting to stay as far away from Aoi as possible in order to try and not accidentally give himself away. His actions had to backfire eventually. Why again had he agreed to Aoi coming along on this trip? Ah right. That damned pout.

Aoi’s eyes narrowed skeptically as though he didn’t believe a single word that left Ruki’s lips, “You what?” he asked, but all Ruki did was shake his head in a display of stubbornness. No way in hell could he finish that sentence – suddenly grow some balls and tell Aoi the truth. Not in a billion years. “Tch,” Aoi placed the glass on the counter with more force than necessary, causing a loud thud and startling Ruki into looking back up at him. “You say you don’t hate me, but you won’t tell me what kind of problem you’ve got with me. How am I supposed to believe you if you won’t give me an explanation?” He rubbed his neck helplessly just like he always did when he was at his wit’s end.

“I don’t hate you,” Ruki replied weakly, his thoughts stuck in a bottleneck, unable to form any kind of cohesive phrase that didn’t consist of these four words. Right now, he didn’t want to think. All he wanted to do was get even more alcohol into his system, and forget Aoi’s piercing eyes, and his nagging questions as well as his own pounding heart that was about to burst like a bubble under the constant pressure it was submitted to. He had hoped to just spend a somewhat fun evening filled with booze, and not with bothersome feelings he didn’t want to think about for a single second. Aoi’s insistence and the way he looked at him as though he was the one hurting deep on the inside broke his heart. Why wouldn’t he stop looking at him like that?

“Fine,” Aoi rose from his barstool, “Prove it to me then,” he demanded. He outstretched his hand to Ruki with an expectant look, all the while all Ruki could do was stare at his hand like a moron.

“Sorry what?” he asked slow-witted.

Aoi sighed, and simply grabbed his hand without awaiting permission, “You said you don’t hate me. Prove it to me then,” he elaborated, already pulling Ruki off his seat and towards the small dance floor.

“W-wait!” Ruki stuttered as he realized where they were heading, his heart about to jump out of his chest. This wasn’t happening, was it? Was Aoi really forcing him to do what he thought he was doing? Panicked, he tried to wriggle himself out of Aoi’s grip, but his fingers were tightly closed around his wrist, not allowing Ruki any room to escape his impending doom. “Please, hold on a second, I-“

However, Aoi had no intention of letting Ruki get away this time, and apparently he was also done talking. In a complete state of distraught, feeling as though his soul had left his body and was now only watching the whole spectacle from the sidelines, Ruki let himself get pulled onto the dance floor, and he failed to put up resistance as Aoi grabbed his other wrist and placed his arms around his neck before he eventually wrapped his own arms around Ruki’s waist. “Prove it to me,” he whispered against Ruki’s ear, pulling his body close until it was pressed against his. “Just dance with me,” Aoi started moving their bodies in synch with the slow music, and Ruki exhaled helplessly. He felt stiff like a statue in Aoi’s arms, his mind was clouded by a weird fog that prevented him from thinking clearly anymore. Was this really happening? Was it just a most cruel dream he would awake from any minute now? Was Aoi actually holding him close, so close, much too close – and yet not close enough? “Dance with me and show me that you don’t hate me. Show me that you don’t mind being with me. Show me that you don’t mind being touched by me.”

A last ounce of common sense still remained in Ruki’s brain, and he shook his head in despair, “I can’t,” he breathed, almost choking on his words. This wasn’t fair; everything he wanted was so near and yet so far, actually touching him and yet being so far out of reach. Because no matter how close their bodies were, miles separated their hearts. “I shouldn’t… we shouldn’t be doing this.” His voice was weak, nothing but a mere whisper, barely loud enough for Aoi to catch his words.

“Why not?” Aoi’s voice was unusually soft, and he placed his fingers beneath his chin to lift it up gently, so Ruki was forced to look at his face instead of his chest. His thumb stroked Ruki’s chin before it tentatively caressed his trembling lower lip, making warm shivers of desire run down his spine. Shivers he ought to fight off, and not relish in them. “You don’t mind being this close and touchy with the others,” Aoi’s tone wasn’t accusatory, only weary, as though he had been fighting the same hopeless battle over and over again for the last few years. “Why won’t you stop pushing me away?” He leaned forward, bringing their lips dangerously close.

 _Please don’t,_ Ruki wanted to scream, or even beg him, but not a single syllable left his mouth. Instead, he watched motionlessly as Aoi drew closer and closer, his heart hammering away relentlessly in anticipation, not able to avert his eyes from Aoi’s. Not able to retreat or push Aoi away. Later, he would surely blame it on the alcohol, simply blame everything on his inebriated state, but right now, he wasn’t able to do a single goddamn thing except stay perfectly still as Aoi kissed him gingerly.

At the faint touch of Aoi’s lips on his, his mind went completely blank.

  
  


Snapping out of his thoughts, Ruki’s head jerked up and he glanced at Aoi angrily, “No I don’t!” he shot back, cheeks flaring up at the memories of what had transpired the previous night. Of what could have only been the beginning of all that had happened between them. How could Aoi have the audacity to make him kiss him, only to continue yammering about how Ruki hated him? What a load of bullcrap. “I already told you last night that I don’t fucking hate you, so stop it!” He grabbed the hem of his morning robe to pull it closely over his chest, covering the last part of bare skin on his upper body, as though this action could somehow make him feel less exposed. “I only said that we need to fix this,” he held up his right hand to wave the wedding ring in front of Aoi’s face, “so spare me that hate-bullshit, because it’s simply not true.” He didn’t know why he reacted in this effervescing manner, all he knew was that his battered heart couldn’t take much more. At the beginning of their joint trip, he had contemplated about the worst thing that could happen. Back then, his answer had been more masochistic feelings, more heartache and more secret longing. Never in the name of God had he expected to find himself in this kind of dilemma. “We just need to annul this marriage somehow…” he reached for the marriage certificate to study it thoroughly for the whereabouts of their marriage ceremony. Surely, those people had to be able to revoke an accidental, drunken marriage like theirs?

Without so much as a warning, Aoi simply yanked the sheet from his hands and threw it to the floor in an almost childish fit of hurt annoyance, “And what if I don’t want to fix this?” he pressed out heatedly.

Ruki blinked uncomprehendingly, his throbbing skull was unable to attribute any sort of meaning to Aoi’s words. “What do you mean?” He looked Aoi in the eye in a futile attempt to find the essence of what he had said written in those beautiful, dark orbs that always mesmerized him beyond rhyme or reason.

Instead of answering him, Aoi simply reached out to cradle his face in his hand, and Ruki bit his tongue in order to calm his racing heart. He knew he needed to withdraw from the touch, but his whole body was paralyzed. “You know exactly what I mean,” Aoi’s thumb brushed across his cheek softly, daringly. “I might not remember much of what happened last night, but I do know one thing,” he smiled faintly, “I don’t regret a single second of it.”

Ruki’s heart skipped a beat, causing him to inhale sharply, “I don’t understand,” he whispered, trying his hardest not to jump to conclusions, nor to open his heart to a possibility that was surely nothing more than a pathetic delusion. Because no way in hell did Aoi mean these things the way Ruki wanted him to mean them.

Sighing softly, Aoi let go off his face, and immediately, Ruki got hit with a wave of disappointment. Of course Aoi hadn’t meant it _that_ way – how could he? He probably saw Ruki as nothing more than a colleague, a close friend at best, a pushy nuisance that always had to make sure he got his way at worst. A nice fuck on the side, perhaps. “Alright,” Aoi said, his voice laced with defeat. But instead of retreating, he took Ruki’s right hand and pressed it against his chest, keeping it in place with both of his hands. “I’ll make you understand then,” he added, and that’s when Ruki felt it. The fast, irregular heartbeat. “I’m not good at talking about these things, but I’ll try to tell you what else I do know, and then maybe you’ll get what I’m trying to say. First off, I know that my heart always does this sort of thing when I so much as look at you. When I hear your voice. When you accidentally touch me, even though you’re always so careful to avoid any direct contact with me.” With every word spoken, Ruki could feel Aoi’s heart pulsate erratically until it was almost in synch with his own hammering heart. “And then, when you fool around on stage with the others while you just keep your distance from me, my heart feels as though it’s going to shatter into a thousand pieces. I can barely stand it to watch you being this close with any of the guys. I keep telling myself it’s only for the fans, but I still can’t stop feeling this way whenever we do a live,” Aoi’s grip around his hand tightened, “I can’t stop wishing that it were me you treated in such an intimate fashion. Do you understand now?” His tone was almost pleading now, as though not only his own personal survival but the fate of the world as well rested on Ruki’s shoulders alone, depended on him comprehending what Aoi just told him.

And he tried to. His mind still hesitant, he tried to process all of what Aoi had just confessed to him, even though his brain still refused to believe him, despite the beating evidence beneath his trembling fingertips. When he looked at Aoi, however, he saw nothing but sincerity in his eyes, and that was when things started to fall into place like a giant jigsaw puzzle. Memories rushed through his head, ever so small fragments of scenes that had taken place between them. Aoi not complaining a single time when Ruki had dragged him through the malls of Tokyo, or foreign shopping districts overseas when everyone else had refused to accompany him on one of his infamous shopping sprees, even though Aoi had always been an advocate for quick, efficient shopping. Aoi indulging in hours of following him through each store, even offering to carry some of his bags when he himself had often only purchased a single item or piece of clothing. Aoi teasing him backstage or in the studio whenever Ruki was too exhausted or too caught up in work to nip his efforts in the bud. Aoi giving him that unexpected, tender kiss on the cheek during their MELT finale a few years back that had almost given him a heart attack. Aoi trying to cheer him up whenever he was in a bad mood, or suffered from writer’s block.

All these seemingly little things rewound in his head like a video tape, filling his head to the brim until he thought it would burst from not being able to contain all the things that were running amok in his mind at the same time. “I… I never knew,” he finally managed to utter after a moment of quiet. “I always thought…” he shook his head in disbelief, the trembling in his hands slowly subsiding, “I always pushed you away because I was scared. I was scared that people would be able to tell. That you’d be able to tell. I never meant for you to think that I hated you, I only ever tried to protect myself from getting hurt. Because I always assumed that you didn’t feel the same way,” he lapsed into silence, hardly comprehending the turn their conversation, if not their entire relationship, was taking.

“I don’t want to annul our marriage,” Aoi admitted quietly, still holding onto Ruki’s hand for dear life, “Marrying you might have been a drunken decision, but it’s definitely been the smartest one I’ve ever made. I don’t care whether people know about it or not. All I care about is for you to be mine.”

Ruki felt a whole swarm of butterflies set loose in his stomach, and a faint laughter of happiness erupted from his throat. Forgotten was his throbbing headache, or his racing heart. All that still mattered was Aoi, and the things he had just told him. Taking heart from Aoi’s words, he intertwined his fingers with Aoi’s. All of a sudden, he didn’t feel afraid anymore. All of a sudden, he felt invincible. “I’m so sorry,” he began, his heart beating incessantly, “I should have told you how I feel ages ago. I always act so tough and confident, but deep down I’m just a huge coward.” He glanced at their joint hands, feeling another jolt of courage seep through him. He took a deep breath and returned his gaze to Aoi’s expectant face, “I love you.”

Aoi’s whole face lit up, a breathtakingly beautiful smile spread across his lips as he squeezed his hand tightly before placing a kiss on his fingers, “I love you, too.” With that, he grabbed Ruki’s waist and turned them around until he lay on top of him, pressing him gently into the mattress. This time, Ruki didn’t freeze, nor did he put up any form of resistance as Aoi’s lips met his in a desirous kiss. Beaming with happiness, Ruki placed his left hand on Aoi’s nape, and pulled him closer to gladly return the kiss, relishing in the taste of his sweet, full lips.

He felt Aoi’s hands trailing across his chest, and moaned expectantly as his fingers tugged at his morning robe playfully. “Don’t you think we should take it slow?” he giggled against Aoi’s lips, “Maybe you should, you know, take me on a date or two first?”

Aoi grunted against his lips before nibbling at his lower lip with his teeth. “Don’t think so,” he muttered, then placed a tender kiss on Ruki’s lips, “we’re already married, after all. Plus, don’t you think we’ve taken it far too slow for far too long?” he whispered against his jaw, only to start distributing chaste kisses all over Ruki’s neck right afterwards.

“Hmm,” Ruki hummed in agreement, tilting his head to the side to grant Aoi better access to his sensitive skin. “One more thing, though,” he murmured, bringing his hand to Aoi’s face to lift his head and get him to look at him. He ran his thumb along Aoi’s lower lip, feeling a rush of ecstasy float through him as it quivered under his touch. “I’ve been yours for a very long time.”

“As have I.”

Not wasting any more time with talking, their lips joined in another heated kiss, greedily tasting each other, hungrily demanding what had been denied for too long. Willingly, Ruki opened his mouth to accept Aoi’s tongue, longingly meeting it with his own. And just like when he had woken up this morning, he felt like he was in a dream, only this time it wasn’t some kind of nightmare, but something he had wished for for so long, never expecting his heart’s desires to be met. He had never expected to be accepted, to have his feelings returned by Aoi. Surely, their road would be bumpy, and not everyone would be too happy about their relationship if they decided to tell anyone, but right now, those were worries for another day. At this moment, all Ruki wanted to do was surrender himself to all these desires he had kept buried for such a long time.

Perhaps, allowing Aoi to accompany him on his trip to Vegas hadn’t been such a bad idea after all.


End file.
